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CestLaTourLeJourParfoisIlPleutEtTuNeM'entendsPas
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[31 Jul 2009|08:53pm] |
nervous apprehensive scared
excited wreckless
waking up to you every morning that I can
i like his morning breathe
forget it
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[24 Jul 2008|12:51pm] |
i just made the best smoothie ever
mango oj vanilla soymilk and ice.
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[16 Jul 2008|12:30pm] |
i feel like two different people
i feel 50/50
i'm done school
i'm going to have alot of time to think
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[29 Jun 2008|09:59pm] |
i realised being in my room alone all day was a bad idea, especially since i felt like i was having a panic attack
i went out with my friend and finished my roll of film in the park down by the thames. just walking smoking and not talking alot was so theraputic
and i feel good about the pictures i took.
then i ate way too much sushi and felt sick
i stayed in bed til 9:15 tonight, it felt good.
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[28 Jun 2008|04:26pm] |
I want to dance in the rain
i feel so sick
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[19 Jun 2008|08:24pm] |
today was such an annoying day
i can't even count the amount if times i snapped or wanted to on everyone
i went to the docs and found out i have tendonitis and carpal tunnel in my elbows and wrists, so now i have to take anti inflammetorys and wear braces on my arms.
so kewl.
i fucking hate school and i want to be done, like right in this moment i dont even like doing hair anymore.
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[19 Jun 2008|02:06am] |
i really wanna road trip
and do good things this summer
i think I'm going to buy a bike this weekend
i need suggestions
suggest lowbudget adventures for summer
simple and good, rewarding
this summer is going to be so good
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[17 Jun 2008|10:05pm] |
so i have become really tight with the one stylist at school.
and she always like lets me in on shit, and she told me the reason i haven't gotten a tip in like 3 weeks is because i always just bring the client to reception and let them pay and I leave, since i don't witness if they tip me or not, reception just pockets my tips.
and i actually felt so shitty because a couple of times i literally SLAVED over people for hours and they were so happy and blabal and then i wouldn't get a tip and it just didn't make sense.
so today i tested it out, i waited at the front while the client paid, and there, 5 dollars tip.
i'm so fucking pissed, i guarantee i just lost out on atleast 20-30 bucks a week for the last 3 weeks.
i seriously hate the bitches that work there. they treat all the students like shit.
never go to devog.
in other news, i am almost done.
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[16 Jun 2008|03:49am] |
i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed i'm so annoyed
why is everyone so fucking shitty and dirty and desperate and disgusting.
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[15 Jun 2008|03:41am] |
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i dont want to sleep silent
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[15 Jun 2008|03:11am] |
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i feel sad
not for myself
i just feel sad about..life and people and lying and lack of communication and loneliness, desperation, withholding yourself to seem like you are something else.
i just feel really sad.
i hate the word pathetic
but it keeps popping into my head
i can't tell if I feel pathetic
maybe everyone is, in certain ways
someone i dont know is sleeping on the couch, im hungry and want to smoke but I feel bad.
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[01 Jun 2008|12:11am] |
i don't feel stupid saying i think I just changed aj's life.
i love being able to talk to people. who are interesting and challenging.
and challenge my views on life.
i know i have good things to say about today and tomorrow and yesterday and 10 years from now.
life could be so good.
i am happy i know whats going on, I need to stop getting lost and confused by silly stupid things that used to shatter my days. it doesn't matter.
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[26 May 2008|02:28pm] |
we left early, and i didn't think
i wasn't thinking at all
i think i'm still not feeling
i'm just thinking about what you're thinking?
i felt good, walking ready to have good talks and fun
then you took my hand, and just held on to it
we didn't even say any thing about it before i left
i just pretended, you just ignored
we just held on, tight tight tight i couldn't breathe
i feel stupid, or embarassed
or..i don't know.
i just want to feel happy about it and confident.
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[23 May 2008|12:36am] |
fuck toronto
fuck unforgiving weather
i want
i don't need
i feel peace of mind,
my body feels unsettled
i'm curious
it's late
where is my heart
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[22 May 2008|09:29pm] |
today sucked
i coudln't shower because the water was orange brown and gunky
i didn't wake up early for school
i got there at like 2 pm
i had a client from 6 until fucking 9 oclock, school is done at 8
there was a moment where i was like "i feel like i could do this all day"
while i was doing her hair
and by the end i wanted to snip my own throat
and i didn't get a tip, which is okay but it made me feel more annoyed when people who do shitty jobs and don't care whatthe client looks like, they get 15 dollar tips
and when i do hair, i am a perfectionist and it takes me forever apparently
and then they just pay the price and fuck off. whatever.
then i thought i had planns after but i guess i didnt
i'm just..over everything right now, I wish I would just go to sleep but
since i slept in forever I can't. and I'm just a whiney baby right now.
i met this guy in costa rica from london england, and today i saw all his pictures from nicaragua, guatemala, panama etc, since he is still travelling, I've been gone for 2 months now, I almost forget it. I just want to be there so badly. I feel like I'm stuck in stupid fucking school forever, making them money. and everyone judges, judging all the time. shuttt uypp
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[19 May 2008|09:31pm] |
may 24 weekend
I had fun for the most part
i was wishing alot of my other friends were there sometimes
my world was a disaster saturday, i had so much fun then when I went to bed everything got weird, I kept hvaing weird day dream hallucinations about one person and all I wanted was for them to be there wrapped around me, and until that happened i didn't feel like i was going to feel safe.
then krystal had a nightmare
and it just got weirder for me, i hardly slept, and when I did, my dreams were so weird and scary.
other than that I had alot of fun, i'm glad to be home in my own bed.
i feel kindof lonely today.
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[14 May 2008|01:05am] |
frig I feel so good right now.
i had the most amazing conversation with my sister tonight.
there is no doubt in my mind she is the best person in my life.
family really is everything.
i feel like I'm in the right place, and I'm discovering so much
i just needed to figure myself out a bit more and welcome/accept the amazing things in life.
as mcuh as i hated london for so long, I don't even think it was london that I hated
it was just the state of mind i was in.
i still don't want to stay here forever, or even close
but i realised i can be content anywhere
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[09 May 2008|09:52pm] |
7:00 pm yesterday
i had a client under the processor and I was washing my bowls from color
i looked to my left and screamed that i was having a deja vu
the girl sitting in the sink next to me said
"a deja vu means that you are exactly where you are supposed to be, right now, and on the right path"
amazing.
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[08 May 2008|12:50am] |
"i'm in london
youre on my mindi miss you"
ive been waiting for this for nearly 10 months.
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[28 Apr 2008|01:02am] |
i want to date chris brown in that no air video
i tried to sell those movies and this ugly purse on ebay and no one bought them haha.
I had a really good weekend. and week in general.
I had a couple of really interesting conversations, with people I never thought I would.
i'm on a journeyy by myself, and i feel so good about it
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